On my way to getting a job

I had my orientation with DARS this morning, and tomorrow I get to call and tell them if I want to work with them. (I do. I knew that going in today.)

Hopefully by Christmas I'll be employed. That would be the awesomest present ever! If not Christmas, then early in the new year. My case manager at LifeNet also told me that I may be able to get a house through Habitat for Humanity, which I thought was just for victims of natural disasters and things like that, but he said no, they also help low-income folks who are working to pull themselves up. It would be cool if I could get a house through them. It's not like they'd just give me a house though... they'd loan me the money for it and then I'd pay it back. I don't care how they do it. Just... a house! Of my very own!

All this is in the future, of course. First I have to get a job, work and save for a year or so to prove I can, and then I'll see about getting a house, whether it's through Habitat or another source.

Things are looking up! :-) The only way they could be better is if I heard from Dallas Housing Authority soon on whether they'll approve my move to my new apartment.

Getting ready to move

As soon as Dallas Housing Authority inspects my new apartment I can move into it. It's just downstairs from where I'm living now, but it's a lot bigger. More room to put my stuff and more room for Alaska to run around. And it'll be good for when I finally move for good. I'm still debating about whether I want a house, a townhome, or maybe a condo. (I hope condos allow pets.)

I still need to find someone who will be willing to co-sign on a loan with me when I'm finally ready to move. I asked my two best friends, and one's credit is as bad as mine and the other flat-out refused. ("I don't co-sign for my partner or my kids, so NO!" lol Well I don't blame him.) Maybe I can get one of my family members to help me out if I need them to.

Well, I better get back to work. Right now I'm trying to clean out my closet and decide what to keep, what to give away, and what to throw away.

Update

I haven't forgotten about my blog, I just haven't had much to write about lately.

I have an appointment at DARS (Department of Aging and Rehabilitative Services, formerly Texas Rehabilitation Commission) on the 25th to see about going back to work. I also need to talk to my case manager at LifeNet (my mental health provider) about getting a part time job through them so I can start saving money for a house. I think I may have to rent for a few years until I get enough experience to move to Ft. Worth. I know I should probably stay where I am, but I do have Alaska to think about. I wish I could find a nice place to live for very low rent, just so I could save some money.

I heard from one of my brothers that we're in the process of dividing up my grandmother's farm and getting each share put into our own names. I'm not sure how long that will take. I will then have to turn around and sell my share to one of my family (anyone know how much land sells for around Warner? A friend of mine says that it's less valuable since it's near an Indian reservation (Talequah). True?) I may either have to sell it on paper (no actual exchange of money) or have them put it in trust for me. The only thing about a trust is that I won't know how long to set it up for. I do know I want to use it to help pay for my house, but I don't want to set the account up for ten years and then need it in seven or whatever.

One thing I would like to do is have someone co-sign for a loan. (My credit sucks, so I could never get one myself.) I'm sure if I get a good enough job I could pay off the loan with no problem. It's something I'll have to talk to my friends about.

Update

I've about decided not to continue with my appeal. I think the fact that I can't get a hold of my medical records is God's way of telling me I need to get my money some other way. And just in case I didn't get it, a lawyer friend of my landlord's also said that it would be better for my physical and mental health if I went back to work.

I'm going to try to get set up with DARS (Department of Aging and Rehabililatative Services) and see if they can help me. I have to admit that I'm still a little worried about having to compete for a job with some kid half my age (college grads are having trouble finding jobs now), but DARS is there to advocate for me. I just hope it doesn't take too long. (I need to call them today and try to get an appointment.)

I'm also going to start withdrawing $100/month in cash from my SSI to save and not tell Social Security. (I hope no one on my friends list works for them... oops! lol) I really want to start saving immediately for a house, and even though it'll take me years, I'm willing to do it. I just don't know if I really want to stay in Dallas. I know I don't have to decide immediately, but I like to plan ahead (it's a control thing, I'll admit). Hopefully by the time comes that I can make the decision I'll have enough experience in whatever career I'm in that it won't be hard to find a job elsewhere. (I really want to do secretarial work -- that's what I trained for and what I'm good at.)

Despite being housebound for so long (I rarely go out except to go shopping or to the doctor... or to meet my friend), I'm still very much a people person. My main concern is that, with my speech impediment, I'll be stuck in a back office somewhere and won't be able to interact with many people. Another thing, I hope I'll be able to get a job among able-bodied people. That's one thing I will insist on (and I imagine the people at DARS won't have a problem with it). Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers that I'll be able to find something.

This wasn't supposed to happen...

I feel like the powers that love to fuck me over are laughing hysterically right now. I was supposed to file my claim today and even if I was denied, my lawyer was going to appeal. Come to find out, even if I do file, since I filed back in 2006 and was denied (apparently I wasn't "disabled enough" or some such shit), I'll just be denied again. I'm the one who lives with back and knee pain, not them! Why do they get to decide if I'm able to work or not?! Everyone I talk to KNOWS I'm disabled... they can literally hear it.

You know, I would actually love to work. But no one will hire me! I've tried to get a job, believe me. I have skills, I'm intelligent, and if there's something I don't know, I know how to open my mouth and fucking ASK. But people listen to how I talk, maybe see how I stand and walk, and I never get called back for an interview. Do you know how much that sucks? Not only that, it's damned hurtful. Okay, I'm slow (physically, at least), but I have a lot to offer an employer. Give me a fucking chance and I'll prove it.

There's so much I want to do, and $700+/month doesn't allow me (or anyone else) to do much. I'm saving as much as I can, but I'm only allowed to save $2,000. If I was on DAC, I could save a million dollars. $2,000 vs unlimited... what would any of you choose? You can do a hell of a lot more with unlimited funds than you can with $2,000. I could take a vacation every year if I wanted, go to Styx concerts, whatever.

I just want to be able to have a good... no, a better life than what I'm living now. Yeah, I'd still have to budget. I'd have to make choices... would I rather spend my money on A or B? But I'd be able to make better choices with more money. (Say, I could afford a hotel room AND get souvenirs at the Styx concert instead of choosing one over the other.)

And the housing thing. As long as I'm only on SSI, I'm pretty much stuck here where I am. I can't afford anything better. I can get on regular Section 8 (right now I'm in a special program for people with physical and/or mental disabilities, but 1. they're not taking applications right now, and 2. I want a place that's (sorta) my own (I'd still be paying rent to someone). I don't think I'm asking for too much, do you?

Well, I've gone on long enough. I needed to vent, and this is way too long for a Facebook status update. If you've made it this far, I thank you for reading! I do appreciate all who read my blog, whether you leave feedback or not.

And apologies for the profanity. Sometimes it just feels good to drop an f-bomb here and there... lol.

Looking for a place of my own

Well, I won't be moving in with my friend after all. So if and when I get my DAC benefits, I'll be saving up to get my own apartment. There's a place right down the street I'm considering called CityVue, and I plan to stop by the leasing office next time I'm out and about to ask about them.

I'll also consider a townhouse if I can find one for $500-$600/month. I wouldn't mind moving up north of here, say Plano, if I can find an inexpensive place. I'll have to get an apartment guide and see what's available. Of course I could move out to Irving too. Or move back to Ft. Worth/Richland Hills. I can ride the TRE back and forth to visit my friends here.

Or I could save my money and find a place out of state. My friend Nessa lives in New Orleans; maybe she could help me find a place there. I've always wanted to visit. It's such a beautiful old city, rich in history and culture (those parts of it that weren't destroyed by Katrina, anyway).

Or I might could go to Chicago. Yes, the winters are brutal, but still it's a lovely city, and I've been wanting to go there (to visit) for quite awhile, too. I do need to research the cost of living where ever I decide to go... don't want to live anywhere that I'll spend all my money just on expenses.

All this is just pie in the sky fantasizing at this point, though... I don't even have my appointment to file my claim until Tuesday. And even then it could be months before I hear anything, and even then I could be denied. (If I am, though, I'll appeal it.)

We'll just have to wait and see...

I'm still very "up" today

I am a little bit sore, though. We walked from the mall to a Target not far away, and I don't know why, but I was just hurting all over when we got there. We picked up some stuff to eat and sat around catching up for an hour or more. We did some browsing and found some cute kitchen appliances that she liked. Then we went back to the mall and browsed a bit through a furniture store, took some pictures, talked a lot, laughed some, and generally had a wonderful time. We talked some about setting up savings accounts. A household account for home maintenance/repairs, and one for emergencies, like in case one of us has to go to the hospital. We'll both be on Medicare, but unlike Medicaid, that requires a co-pay for medications (don't know about hospital stays or any procedures/surgeries). She also suggested setting up advance directives and making each other our emergency contacts, which makes sense. Neither of us are particularly close to our families, so we'll know more than they do about each other's medical issues and needs.

Out of $1,300/month (I'm still going to try to put at least $500/month into savings), I'd like to put $50-$100 into both joint accounts (household and emergency).

I found out last night when I checked my email that I have to redo all the forms that my lawyer sent me because they misspelled my last name on the first batch. Oops!  :-) But I don't mind; I'm used to people not being able to spell or pronounce my name. lol (I've thought about changing it partly for that reason. Ciana Douglas (the name I use on forums) is a little easier to spell and say. Besides, I happen to think it's a beautiful name.)

So that's what happened yesterday. I'm hoping to get together with her again soon, maybe at the end of the month, providing it's not cold and rainy like yesterday.

Randomness

Wow, I've had this blog since October, and already I've posted 68 (including this one) entries! I wonder how many I'll post by this October (the one year anniversary, eight months from now)? I look forward to that. Hopefully I'll be posting from wherever my roommate and I are living at the time.

I'm hoping that I get my dad's check (for Feb.) on Monday or even tomorrow or Saturday. (I think it may have gone out Tuesday.) I'm planning to take it right to Chase Bank and opening a checking and a savings account with most of it, and keeping something like $50. I'm also expecting my check for March on the 28th or so, and I'll be doing the exact same thing (and using it to set up direct deposit so it won't  get lost in the mail again... the first time this has happened!

Hey, I just thought of something! It would be awesome if my roomie and I each got north of $1,000/month in disability. That way we could afford to pay more for a nicer house! I'd like to be able to get a really nice place. (Or at least a fixer-upper that doesn't need much fixing...) My roomie has been looking at 2, 3, and 4 bdrm houses, which would be good. (Possibly we could have guests if we got a 4 bdrm? We'd like one to use as an office. Keep our computers, files, etc. in there.)

I'm not sure how she'd feel about a two-story house. It would be fun for the dogs to be able to run up and down stairs, and I could also use the exercise, lol. I need to lose some of this gut! (BTW, I found some workout clothes on Amazon, along with a Total Gym. I already have a Total Gym, although I don't know if I'm going to take it with me. I may donate it to the building and see if anyone here would want to set it up and use it. If not, I can sell it.)

I also have to work on finding out how much land goes for in OK. I inherited about 5 acres (I think) from my grandmother, and since I don't plan on ever living up there again, I'd rather have the money than the property. My brother is willing to buy it from me if I can find out how much to ask for it. If I can get my cousin David's phone number, I could call him and find out.

............

Just messaged my aunt on Facebook and asked her if she knew how to get in touch with him. Hope she gets back in touch with me. I don't know if the property is in my name or not (probably not; I never signed any papers or anything that I remember... although I was so upset at the time, I may have forgotten. I don't even know what happened to all the stuff that was in the house... I do know that I've never gotten anything.) I don't know why I'm writing all this. It's been a little over six years since she passed, and while I think about her all the time (and it still makes me sad that I won't see her again for a long time (God willing), I'm talking about what I can get from her estate?!?! Does that make me sound like a greedy biotch? I hope not. I remember what my aunt said at her funeral, because it was the same thing I was thinking. Grandma had three children of her own, but she had ten kids. Me and my three brothers, her brother's four sons, plus her own. She was a remarkable woman with a huge heart, and I can't say enough about her. What I wouldn't give to be able to see and talk to her again. I'll miss her always.

Musings...

As I said in my Facebook status update yesterday morning, I called a disability attorney who is going to try to see if she can get me my DAC benefits. If she does, I'm going to start saving up money so I can get an apartment away from here. I really want out, and I can continue saving money for when my roommate and I are ready to buy our house (yes, we're going to do the "rent-to-own" thing). At this point, I really don't care where we live, whether we stay in Texas or move out of state. I just want to leave.

Some things I'd love to have for the new place: nice furniture (we both have bedroom stuff, but we need living, dining, and kitchen stuff); I want my bedroom and bath (if we have 2 bathrooms) to be decorated in shades of purple (plum, lilac, orchid, that type of thing). She prefers peach and burgandy... she'd like burgandy for the living room. I wonder if we could add some peach and purple accents? I guess we could go to some kind of furniture showroom and get some ideas. She suggested awhile back that maybe we could go to Lowe's or somewhere and get some stick-on borders (with her asthma, we can't do any painting). I wonder if there is any such thing as wallpaper you can just stick on? I mean stuff you don't need paste to put it up. That would also be a good thing. (Don't want her having an attack because of the fumes.)

Also, I want to save up to buy some new clothes (even if they're only new to me, i.e., from Goodwill). I have some nice things that I'll be taking with me, of course, but I want some new pants (as of now, I only have two or three pairs that fit). And if we end up moving up north (Seattle or Minneapolis), I'll need some good cold weather clothes (sweaters and coats and such. Don't forget the long johns, either! :-)) And I want some new sheet sets. I have a few sheets, but I want to be able to change my bed more than a couple of times a week. Maybe I'll sell my current bed and save up for a full size? That way Alaska and I will both have room. (Yes, she sleeps with me.)

I also need a dog carrier and a bed for her. I'd like to be able to take her to the dog park (there's one at White Rock Lake, I think, off of Mockingbird), and the only way my counselor (onsite) will take me is if she's in a carrier. Which is understandable. If we ever got into an accident, she could be hurt, and I'd be devastated.  George understands that she's my baby (he has dogs, too, and I bet he feels the same way about them), and how it would tear me up if anything happened to her, especially if I could have prevented it. So when I get my check next month, I'm going to Petsmart (there's one on Greenville, not too far from where I live) and price carriers and beds.

..............

Yay! I just went to Amazon, and they have a purple zebra stripe pet carrier for $39. I'm going to get it! (I hope shipping isn't too much...) So next month I can go to the dog park and let Alaska run around and play with the other dogs. I'm happy now! :-)

Added lots more stuff to my Amazon want list...

Among them are some Spanish and French language courses. There's a lady who comments on Jameson Parker's blog fairly frequently who's French, and I would love to learn her language. I've done pretty well in the past picking up various words and phrases in foreign languages (thank God for a good memory!), and now that I'm getting older, I think it would be a good idea for me to continue giving my brain a good workout by trying to learn new things. Yeah, it'll be hard since I won't have anyone to practice with (except for "talking" to Anita on JP's blog), but still... And since I do live in Texas, it will be good for me to learn some more Spanish, too. (My housekeeper speaks it, as do some of the residents in my building.) I think it'll be fun.

I've also put some of my other favorite books and CDs and DVDs on my want list. Hopefully I can order some of them for my birthday. I should have close to $1,000 by then, and even spending $250 of it on a new (used) computer, I'll have enough left to have a nice birthday.

I've been a little bit upset this past week. I haven't gotten my check from my dad's retirement from the airport yet, and I'm really hurting for money. I need to buy groceries soon, and I don't know what to do. I tried to call the lady in charge of the retirement accounts at the airport, but she hasn't been in the office and hasn't gotten back to me. I hope she does soon so I can find out where my check is. I'm hoping it will be here next week.  I'm also trying to get my dad's social security number so I'll have it when I go back to apply for my DAC benefits.

I'm hoping that we'll find a house soon, too. I'm being as patient as I can, but if you know me, you know that's not easy! lol

Not good news, but I can take care of it

I went to my appointment today, and guess what? They couldn't find a trace of my dad in the computer. I gave the lady his name, his birthdate, birthplace, my grandmother's maiden name... nope, not there. WTF? I called the lady in charge of the DFW Airport retirement plan (whatever they call it) and asked her to call me back with his social security number. (I hope they have it.) Now I just have to wait...

I also found out the correct terminology for what I'm applying for... it's Disabled Adult Children's benefits. Now I don't have to give the lengthy explanation the next time I have an appointment.

I have a doctor's appointment at the end of next month. I'm going to try to get a full physical exam (I expect Social Security will want proof from a doctor that I have the disabilities that I say I do. Of course they know I have cerebral palsy and scoliosis, but I also have arthritis, emphysema, and bipolar disorder, all of which I was diagnosed with after I was approved for SSI.) So I guess sometime in March I'll go back to Social Security and apply for DAC benefits. Hopefully I'll be able to get them.

Have an appt. at Social Security on Thursday

I'll be applying (for the second time) for SSDI. I hope I can get it this time. I'm going to call a lawyer as soon as I get home and see if he'll work with me to get it. I'm hoping that if I can get even a few hundred dollars more a month, then I can save enough by the end of the year to make a down payment on a house.

My roommate talked to a paralegal in her lawyer's office this morning (she said the woman was awfully rude!) and the paralegal will talk to the lawyer. I hope he'll finally get off his ass and help her!  She needs the money!

I think I have a couple of hundred in savings right now. Hopefully I'll get my check from my dad's retirement tomorrow. With my weekly allowance, that will be $184. I need to do some grocery shopping, and I also have an appt. at the groomer's next Monday for Alaska. That'll cost about $60.  I also need to get some quarters to do laundry (another reason I want to get my own place... I can have a washing machine and dryer that I don't have to pay to use!).

I need a new phone. The screen froze on my current one and I can't use the little slider thingy to unlock it. I hope I have insurance on it. I really don't want to have to pay for a new one (or at least pay full price, which I believe was $60). Sometimes technology is more trouble than it's worth, lol. I can say the same about my computer, although it's not really the computer's fault that the broadband link is unavailable (and comes back when it damn well pleases), or that the DNS lookup failed (what the hell does that even mean???). Sometimes I feel like doing an Elvis (am I the only one who's heard the story (possibly apocryphal) that whenever Elvis didn't like what was on tv, he'd pull out a gun and shoot it? Good thing I don't have a gun in my possession; I'd be doing that to my computer at least five times a day. lmao) #firstworldproblems

Well, I'll probably update between now and Thursday, but I'll definitely let you all know how my appt. with Social Security went!

*Sigh*

I'm not sure whether to get my hopes up or not. I just saw a Facebook message from my friend that she found a house that are rent-free for the first three months and then $450/month beginning the fourth month. That would sure help us save money to buy stuff we'll need, but after so many disappointments, I'm not sure how to feel. I guess I'll wait for her to text me back (I asked for more info).

I'm more than ready to get out of here (even though she doesn't have her disability yet... I guess if she doesn't get it within those three months, I could use my savings to pay her half, and she could pay me back?!). I have an appointment at Social Security on the 31st to apply for SSDI, so maybe I'll be getting more money myself. I hope so. One of my biggest dreams (I've said this before) is to have a home of my own (or in this case, half of my own) with nice stuff. I'm keeping most of my furniture except for one chest of drawers that I don't use. So I have a bed, a chest of drawers, a desk, and a wicker chest to keep stuff in. I also have three trash cans (one we can keep in the kitchen, one for my bedroom, and one for the bathroom); I have dishes and silverware and a couple of pots and pans (I do have a wok that we can use for stir-fry if we want). I don't know what all she has, but I suspect that there's a lot we'll need. (Living room/dining room furniture, for sure, and probably other stuff for the kitchen, which we can get off of freecycle. We'll need at least a couple of TVs. I can buy one, I guess, since I'm planning to anyway. We'll need to see how much the utilities (gas/water/electricity) will be, then see how much we'll have to spend for internet/cable (or satellite).)

I guess I'll have to wait until tomorrow to hear back from her.

Just contacted an attorney

Now, now, don't freak out. No one's in any legal trouble; I just need help in getting on disability.

I've applied before, but Social Security told me that in order to collect my dad's Social Security, I had to have applied within two years after his death. Well, when I applied for SSI in '97, no one told me that. I had no idea I could even apply for SSDI under him. So now I'd like a lawyer to help me get it. Maybe they can find some sort of loophole or something that can allow me to have it. I'm hoping so, anyway. My rent will increase, but I don't care about that. All I care about right now is that I can save a lot more money under SSDI than I can under SSI. (I'm not sure how much they'll let you have in savings under SSDI, but it's only like $2,000 under SSI. I want to at least save enough to make a down payment on a really nice house in a nice area.)

I'm not sure how long it will be before we find a house. I'm still hoping it will be soon.

I just posted on the Richland High School Alumni page on Facebook. I hope someone will see it and be able to help. If not, I guess we'll continue searching on rent.com or some other site.

Y'all please keep us in your thoughts and prayers!

Update

I talked to my friend Doug on Tuesday, and he said when my birthday comes around, he'll take me to a pawnshop and help me get a new laptop. He paid $250 for the one he has, and has never had a problem with it. I'll still need to get a flash drive so I can download my stuff from my current computer and then upload it to my new one. I'll also have to get Norton, but that only costs $60/year, so no problems there. I'll also have money left over to get an iPod! Yay!

 I went and got my ID renewed yesterday. It'll take about two weeks for it to come in the mail. As soon as I get my check from my dad, I'll go open a bank account. I'm still thinking Chase. I've banked with them before, and they always treated me well. I'm going to open a checking and a savings account, putting back $25/month, and any extra money I save up from my weekly allowance from my SSI. (I'm trying to live off $50/week while saving up $150-$200/month.) I think I'm doing pretty well with that. I may be able to take a trip in the fall to see Styx after all if I keep going the way I am. About every six months I plan to cash in what I've saved up in change and put that in savings, too, so hopefully I'll have a several hundred dollars by the time I decide when and where to go see the band. Of course, I'll have to save money in case my friend and I find a house within the next few months, too. I still would like to move by the summer, but I don't know. I'll just have to keep praying that we'll find something soon.

I just read this article ("The Lying Disease"), and it's just horrifying how many liars, scammers, and cheats there are on the internet. I'm not talking about the Nigerian scams, the "friends" who are stranded in foreign countries with no money, etc.; but people who would fake serious, often fatal illnesses to get sympathy and/or money. As it says in the article, Manchausen's Syndrome/Manchausen's by Proxy has been around for decades, and the invention of the internet has just made it easier for these people to scam total strangers. I fee kind of sorry for them (they're mentally ill, after all), but as one commenter said, that's no excuse. I wonder exactly how much their therapy is helping them.

I'm going to go ahead and out myself here. I can be very manipulative myself. It's easier (on me) if I can get other people to do stuff for me. Like getting on SSDI. I've tried to get my counselor to do all that (contact Social Security, since as I told him, social worker types all speak the same language and maybe he could move things along faster. It's also why I wanted him to help me get on Section 8 even with the years long waiting list. He suggested that I contact the housing authorities in places like Garland, although I'd actually rather live someplace like Plano... Collin Creek Mall is there, and I love that place!) It would be very easy for me to make up a fake persona and go on various forums and play the victim. But I can't bring myself to do that. Sooner or later someone would catch me in a lie (or a dozen) and then they'd never trust me again. That would be the worst thing that I could imagine.

One thing I want to do on this blog is be as transparent as possible. I won't always go into great detail about my life, but I will be honest. If I need to vent, then I'll vent (as I've already done a couple of times). I'll be willing to share my joys and my sorrows with everyone whether I know them or not. (I have people in my Google+ circles, and hope to gain more. Anyone and everyone is welcome to comment on this blog or leave a message for me.)

Thanks to all who read my blog. I really appreciate it.

I'm putting back $150 of my SSI check in savings. That means in four months (by my birthday) I'll have $600 saved up. By July it'll be $900. I think that's enough to buy a new computer and an iPod. I'll wait and buy the other stuff I want for Christmas. (The stereo and CDs and stuff.)

Unless my friend and I end up moving before then (I hope we will), then I'll just use the money for my share of the down payment on the house. I haven't been on freecycle in a while, so I don't know what kind of stuff they have on there. It really depends on what area of the city we move to. The "high rent" areas (for lack of a better term) will naturally have nicer stuff people want to give away. Hopefully the people whose house we end up renting/buying won't mind if we install a satellite dish in their yard, because I really want to get something like DISH Network (I wonder if they have internet service? I guess I'll call and ask when time gets closer for us to move.).

I actually think I'd better hold off on the computer and stuff until after the move... two things I want to buy for the new house (at least my room) are a digital TV and a DVD player. Both of those will probably cost me a couple of thousand dollars, depending on where I buy them (Best Buy or Target or someplace). I could look on Amazon or someplace like that. Maybe they'd have them cheaper. I've bought a lot of stuff from Amazon, and I've never been disappointed.

I'm hoping my friend can get her disability soon and find a house so we can get out of our respective living situations!

Musings

I still can't get over the fact that Jameson (Parker; JP) responded to my comments on his blog yesterday. (Okay, so I'm still a little star-struck... I had such a huge crush on the man back in the 80s when he was on Simon & Simon (he played AJ)). But I do enjoy his posts. A few days ago, he wrote an amusing entry, and now he writes something like his "Gun Appreciation Day" entry. And he writes so well! That's the kind of writing I aspire to do. Of course, I don't have the kind of life experiences that he does, so I can't write about the same types of things that he does. (Maybe I'll get one of those emails promising me great riches if I send my personal info to some bank I've never heard of in London or where ever. You know, the ones where an African patriarch died and they haven't been able to find his family, blah-de-blah... Those are always fun to read. Or the lottery somewhere in England. Hey, if I could win a few zillion pounds (how much is a pound in American dollars, anyway?) I could forget about renting a house and just flat-out buy one. A house big enough for me, my friend, our dogs, and maybe more dogs.)

Okay, maybe not. But it's fun to dream about having lots of money. Be as rich as Oprah, or Bill Gates, or Donald Trump... I'd buy the biggest house and property I could find and become the crazy dog lady. :-) I'd adopt as many dogs from shelters as I could, or even right from people who couldn't keep their dogs anymore. And they would live in the lap of luxury, of course. Only the best food and shelter for my babies.

Have y'all heard about that Publisher's Clearinghouse sweepstakes they're doing now? The $5,000/week for life one? What I could do with that much money! And then I might leave it to my friend if I died before she did, or to one of my brothers. Of course, I'd bury most of it in the bank. (Find the best interest-bearing account I could.) I'd make almost a quarter of a million dollars the first year alone (before taxes; I have no idea how much I'd have to pay in taxes. I might be lucky to have $100,000 at the end of the year.) But hey, that would be a heck of a lot more than I'm making now!

Hmmm, I'm getting way off what I was writing about at first, lol. (I tend to do that.) Getting back on topic, I might see if I can go back to school or take a few online courses in creative writing. I've always loved to write, and it probably wouldn't hurt to beef up my skills. My grandmother took some classes when she and my aunt lived in AZ, and she wrote some stories about her life. One of my favorites was a story she used to tell all the time about when I first moved to OK to live with her and my step-grandfather.

It seems a couple of ladies from Green Country MHMR (that's the closest I can come to what it was called) came out to evaluate me. (I have no idea why, and neither did my dad or grandmother.) Anyway, they did a bunch of tests (which I passed with flying colors; I was an intelligent kid!), one of which involved raisins and a bottle. They put the raisins in the bottle and watched to see if I could figure out how to get them out. Of course the neck of the bottle was too small for me to reach my finger into and get them out, so after puzzling over it for a bit, I turned the bottle over and shook them out. Grandma said that as the ladies were leaving, one of them turned to her and said, "Mrs. Merritt, if that child's retarded, I'd sure hate to see a smart one!" lol (Retarded, no. Scatterbrained in the extreme, but definitely not retarded. I'm one of those people who'd lose or forget their head if it wasn't firmly attached.)

I wish I could remember more of my childhood. It's funny (weird) that I have such a great memory, but except for a few little things, I can't remember much about growing up in Oklahoma or visiting my parents in Richland Hills (or even after I moved to Texas full-time). I remember watching my brothers Pat and Lonnie playing football, I remember things like chasing the bus down when I missed it. I remember my brother Lonnie carrying me to the end of the driveway on cold winter mornings. I remember a few of my teachers (like my first-grade teacher, Anna Milligan, who taught me to read. I picked up on that really quickly, needless to say. You can hardly find me without a book these days.)

I remember going to Six Flags when I came down to visit my dad. I even remember the first time I rode the Shockwave there. I was scared of the loops, and ducked my head, getting it trapped between me and the restraining bar. My brother Frank and his then-wife had to work hard to get my head unstuck. I spent a few Christmases with my parents, and I remember one year I got a baby doll that I loved. (I don't know what happened to that doll. I think her name was Angel.)

I do remember one year my grandmother made me a doll (a Cabbage Patch-type doll). She had curly yellow hair, and I named her Elizabeth Ann. I ended up giving her to my Aunt Annette because she had a childhood friend named Elizabeth Ann. (My grandmother made me another doll, of course.) And there were the soft sweaters that all the girls were wearing in Jr. High. I wanted one so bad, and I asked my Aunt Jessie for one for Christmas. Unfortunately, what I got was a purple wool winter sweater. (Okay, that makes since. It was winter, after all, and she didn't know about the fashions in Warner, OK, being from Michigan.)

Jeez, I talk to much even when I'm writing, lol! I'll probably post more memories (such as they are) later.

I like this one

My friend was searching Craigslist, and found a nice sounding house. Here's the description:

Monthly payment is only $695 -- and includes the taxes and insurance. 
NOTE: 100% of your down payment goes towards the purchase price of your home. 

This is a nice 1,215 sq. ft. home with 3-bedrooms, 1-1/2 baths and a 1-car garage. 
It's located on a large lot that backs up to a park. No neighbors in your backyard! 
The kitchen has counter space galore! 
There are two living areas- open living and dining rooms. 
The Master suite includes private half bath.

Not bad! (Although we don't really need the garage, as neither of us drive... I guess my friend could get her license, though.) Hope she calls the guy selling it so we can go look at it. It's in Pleasant Grove, not far from where I live now.

We both prefer the 3 bdrm so we can have office space. (I guess she'll need an office more than I will, depending on the size of the bedrooms.) 

I realize that we can't move right away, not until she gets her disability. I don't make enough to cover all the bills (rent, utilities, cable/internet, cell phone), so it may still be a few months. However, when her check comes in, I'll be ready! 

I guess we could keep looking, but I hope we can find an affordable place soon. The only other prospect so far is a 2 bdrm condo, and the listing didn't say anything about it being pet-friendly. So that's out (probably). 

The thing is, I'd love to adopt another dog after I move. I'd love a little Yorkie. They're so cute! But that'll have to wait, probably until next year. I want to see how my friend and I do as roomies, how our current dogs get along, etc. And of course, I'll have to save up for the adoption fee.

I'm wondering how much a townhouse would cost, or a duplex. That way my friend and I could still live together, but both have our own totally separate spaces. But we'd probably have to pay separate rent on the duplex, and the whole idea of being roommates is to split the costs. So probably no on that idea.

Another thought I've been having is that I'm going to have to let my housekeeper go when I move. I feel sort of guilty about that... she depends on these jobs for money to pay her own bills, and I feel like I'm kind of stiffing her. She just started working for me a week ago, and even though she'll probably have a few months of work, she probably figured on this being a long-term thing. After I leave, she'll have to find someone else to work for, and that may not be easy. I hope she can. I don't want her losing anything by my leaving.

I guess I'll have to talk to my property manager and my counselor about all this soon.

Hopefully it won't be too soon...

before I can move.  My friend has found a nice house in Irving, not far from the mall. 4 bdrm/2 1/2 bath, living room, den, GOURMET(!) kitchen, huge back yard... rent is $700/month, and the owners may even do a rent to own contract. If we don't end up getting that one, she knows of a few other possibilities. Hopefully we can get this moving soon.

She's writing a book right now; she almost has it completed. I don't know if she's planning to go through a publisher or self-publish (that's hard!), but she's hoping to get a lot of sales and maybe some speaking engagements out of it, so that will be good. I've offered to act as her personal assistant (no pay; I just want the experience right now), and we'll talk about that.

It may be awhile before we can make any kind of final plans to move. She's still trying to get her disability, too, plus her dog Chloe is about to have puppies, so it'll be awhile before they're weaned and ready to sell.

Looks like I'll be tossing my cigs in the not-too-distant future... maybe I'll get an e-cig. That would help me cut down on my smoking, and no harmful chemicals to make her sick. I'll have to see how much they'll cost.

It also looks like I may have to wait awhile to get my new laptop, iPod, and other stuff. But if I can work for my friend for awhile, get some experience under my belt, and then get a paying job, that would be awesome. I'd like to be a secretary someplace (or a PA for someone) to get some good money coming in. I won't ask my friend to pay me... I think it's enough that she's willing to have me move in with her. And I think I'm helping her out as much as she's helping me, so it all evens out.

I may convince her to do some blogging, too, to help promote her book. Probably not here on blogspot, though... this place seems to be kind of dead. At least most of the blogs I've llooked at don't seem to have been updated in a year or two. That doesn't bode well for anyone seeing either of our writing. I'm going to check into a few other blogging sites and see how the writers there do as far as updating, and how their readership is. I'll still keep this one open (don't want to lose everything I've written thus far, and copying/pasting/saving and moving it to a new place seems like too much of a pain in the keister. I'll let everyone know if I find a new place to blog, of course.

Haven't had much to post about lately...

And still don't. I have a very boring life, lol. I do have 55 followers on Twitter now, if anyone's interested. :-) I'm still saving up my money in case I move, or for my birthday/Christmas, whichever comes first. I'd like to see if I can get my change jug filled halfway (it's a 5 gallon jug, so that's a lot of spare change!) so I can buy something really nice. I wonder how much I can save in five months? (Or four months, since my birthday's in May.) Maybe I'll just save up my change for Christmas, and use the money I save from my SSI and pension checks for my birthday. Actually, I don't think I'll be spending any money for my actual birthday; I'll save it all until July or August and use it to buy my new laptop and maybe a printer and an iPod if I have enough. (Definitely the iPod, though.)

I also have to take Alaska to the groomer at the beginning of next month to get a bath and a trim. She's getting long and shaggy. (Of course, that's part of the reason I got her... I wanted a long-haired fur baby, but I need to keep her looking nice.) I try to do that every couple of months.  Right now she's engaged in a battle royal with one of her squeaky toys. I love watching her. She barks and growls while she's playing, and I love that.

The property manager at my building is trying to get a vet to come out once a year and give free vaccinations to all the pets (there are a few dogs and cats here). That would be great, since most of us are living off our government checks, and several people have no income at all. (Dallas Housing Authority pays the majority of those people's rent.)

Let's see... there's really not much else to write about. I'm going to try to post something at least once or twice a week, even if it's just a very short piece.